To Begin Again

Where have all the posts gone?

Good question.

I had close to two hundred posts, dating back to 2009 (that’s all that survived my periodic purging). While I’ve recently toyed with deleting them entirely and abandoning my blogging hobby altogether, I know from experience that I would regret such a drastic move. Instead, I marked my remaining posts “private”, knowing there may come a day when I want to re-read them or send them back out into the world.

The past two years have been unbelievably difficult. It’s been tragedy upon tragedy, loss upon loss. Navigating all the grief continues to be a challenge for us as a family.

I am left with this question –  why fill the world with more sorrow by re-telling and re-hashing so much pain? 

I wrote in my intro, long ago, that I try to keep the whining to a minimum. And for the most part, I really did try to do that. But as the bad started to pile up, it became harder and harder.

Writing has always been how I process things. And for a while, I took comfort in processing in this sort of anonymous, public context. Lately, however, I find that my struggles and my despair demand something more private. A quieter space for my heart to heal.

Thank you, dear readers, for indulging me these past eleven years. Through my blog, I’ve gained perspective and friendships that I will treasure forever.

I won’t rule out a return to blogging someday, but until the day I’m ready to begin again…

Namaste.